How to Avoid Narcissists (and Other Online Dating Scammers) – Thrive After Abuse
My answer is going to be a mixture of personal experience plus something a therapist once said. People who have issues with real intimacy and/or lacking the . Read 6 Ways to Fail at Dating after Narcissistic Abuse There's no way to know for sure, whether you meet someone online or at the grocery. How do you know if you're dating a narcissist? And one online narcissist support group has more than 36, members trying to deal with or.
Most of them are smart enough to not say that they are from Africa, but many will claim that they are from Sweden, the UK, or Jamaica. Everything you like and want in your life, they do too!
- 3 Dating Sites to Avoid That are Crawling with Narcissists
You love to hike and camp? You are a homebody? Never mind that their profile talks about them traveling the world, and doing all these other non-homebody things. You want to start a llama farm and dye them different colors like Easter eggs?
What are the odds?! They get all this info from your profile, from your pictures, and from talking to you at great length. All of this mirroring is done so they can proceed to 10… Now that they have gathered all this information about you, they begin combining their love bombing with future faking.
If you have kids, they want to be a great dad to them; if you are sick, they want to take care of you. They weave a story of this ideal future full of all the elements that you want—and they want it to start as soon as humanly possible.
They will tell you that they want to see you as soon as they return to the country. Targets find themselves really falling head over heels for the scammer, as they seem so sincere, and so ready, willing, and eager to commit. They really do seem like the perfect person. Everything about you is exactly what they were looking for.
Everything is happening at lightning-fast speed.
Online Dating and Narcissists
They will most likely want you to send them sexy pictures, or start talking dirty with them. The goal with rushing intimacy is to get you to feel exactly this way. You start questioning yourself.
Is what you are experiencing strange, or too good to be true? Maybe you just have issues with men? Is this a scam? Do you want to move this fast? Are you asking friends and family what they think about this person, or about these emails? This is all a huge red flag. Think about it—do you question the behavior, or your interpretation of the behavior of your friends, family or coworkers assuming they are not Narcissists or have some sort of other issue?
Things happen at a comfortable pace, and there is no behavior that is setting off your Spidey senses. Listen to your intuition. Someone dies; they have to sell their business ASAP; they are stuck overseas due to a medical condition, airline strike, the weather, sun spots, or they got kidnapped by pirates. If they ask you for money to get out of their disaster, then it is definitely a scam.
Again, this is the year They should have some sort of information online if they are in business of any kind. You can always ask them for the name of their company, or where they work and Google that. They either want to send you money, or are asking you for some.
The fastest way to determine if you are dating a scammer: Insist they chat with you on Skype or Facetime. Search for them as well as their pictures online.
Copy and paste every picture they have on their profile, and the ones that they are sending you into Google images, and see where else on the internet those images show up. Does this scenario seem familiar? They suggest giving you their personal email so the two of you can see where things lead. This could well be their very first attempt at isolating you. If the person is a narcissist, of course they want to get you off of the site because then no one else can woo you, which gives them a much higher chance of successfully grooming you into their perfect supply.
How to Avoid Narcissists (and Other Online Dating Scammers)
If you still feel the urge to find love online, make sure you follow these basic rules: Join hundreds of subscribers who are UPPING their dating game, ditching the users and losers, and creating the relationship they want!
Now check your email and confirm you want to receive the Let Me Reach dating quick guide! There was an error submitting your subscription. First Name Email Address We use this field to detect spam bots. For those who are looking for something casual and carefree, this can be empowering and exciting.
3 Dating Sites to Avoid That Are Crawling with Narcissists
For those who are looking for a longer-term commitment, however, they may have to sort through many covert manipulators before finding someone who is compatible with their needs and desires. A half-hearted relationship that results in more losses than gains is one where no one wins — except, of course, the person who gets all the benefits of your company without the effort.
Manage your expectations online and realize that there will be many people in cyberspace who will try to get your maximum investment while putting in the minimum effort.
Integrity and transparency are becoming less and less commonplace and is especially rare online. Do not put up with the dwindling standards for human decency. Instead, be very wary of and cut off contact with predators online who attempt to manipulate you into giving them what they want while dismissing your needs. Their actions will always speak louder than words. The right person who is compatible with you will want what you want — whether you meet them online or in real life.
It will be clear — and that will be the relationship that will be worth investing in. Finding love in a hopeless place: Living in the age of entitlement.